Are You Abandoning Yourself?

Welcome back to the current issue of the Law of Attraction Key Newsletter!

Do you struggle with feeling abandoned, anxious, depressed, empty, alone, guilty, ashamed or angry? The answer (and solution) might not be what you think. This is SO important, so I brought in Dr. Margaret Paul to help you today.

Truly, if you struggle with any of these negative emotional cycles, please take a minute to read this now and you can be on the path to freedom right away.

Also, in the Quick Tip section of this issue I give you 1 simple question that can completely shift you from self-judgment to self-love. How exciting is that?!

I want to thank you in advance for sharing your comments and questions today? It is amazing to be able to hear from you and help you along your journey – your voice is unique and valuable! When you leave comments and questions after these articles, it helps me get to know you and what you need and how I can best help.  I highly encourage you to take action – leave a comment or a question and come back for my reply – I look forward to talking with you here!

Life Mastery Is Yours!


P.S. Have you connected with me on Facebook yet? I’d love to see you there:


“Send love to yourself, every day – you deserve it – you are extraordinary!”

Kristen Howe

Are You Abandoning Yourself?

By Dr. Margaret Paul

Do you believe that feelings of abandonment are coming from others abandoning you – or do they come from self-abandonment?

When we think about abandonment, we generally think about being left by someone. But abandonment is about leaving someone we are responsible for – a child or an old or sick person who cannot take care of themselves and whom we have agreed to take care of.

As a healthy adult, another adult can leave you, but they cannot abandon you, since they likely have not agreed to be responsible for you.

It might seem strange to you, but, as a healthy adult, when you feel abandoned by someone, it is not actually about them. It is about having abandoned yourself.

Most people don’t think about how they abandon themselves because they don’t recognize that they are responsible for themselves – physically, emotionally, spiritually, financially, relationally and organizationally.

Sometimes we abandon ourselves in one area and take responsibility for ourselves in another area. For example, you might work hard to make a good living and have learned how to manage your money, which means that you are taking financial responsibility. But you might be abandoning yourself physically by eating poorly, not getting exercise and not getting enough sleep. When this is the case, you are physically abandoning yourself. Or perhaps you take organizational responsibility by being on time and keeping your environment neat and clean, but you abandon yourself relationally by giving yourself up and/or not speaking up for yourself.

One of the most common ways that many people abandon themselves is emotionally. Most people don’t realize that they are responsible for learning to lovingly manage their feelings. Few of us had good role models for managing our painful feelings in ways that support our highest good. Instead, we learned many dysfunctional ways of avoiding our feelings.

Emotional Self-Abandonment

I’ve discovered four ways that many people emotionally abandon themselves:

  1. Self-judgment

How often are you aware of judging yourself? Do you tell yourself that you are not good enough, that you are a failure, that you are stupid, or ugly or bad? I don’t think I’ve ever counseled a person who didn’t judge their self in some ways.

  1. Staying in your head rather than being present in your body

Do you spend most of your awake time thinking, being unaware of your feelings? Is thinking a way you’ve learned to avoid feeling your feelings?

  1. Turning to various addictions

Have you learned to turn to various addictions to avoid feeling your feelings? Do you indulge in substances, activities or various forms of controlling behavior to avoid your feelings?

  1. Making another or others responsible for your feelings

Do you look to others for the attention and approval that you are not giving to yourself? Do you then try to control them with anger, judgment, compliance, withdrawal or resistance, in order to get them to give you want you want?

Keep Reading to Discover What Your Inner Guidance System Is…

Do you experience feelings of unworthiness and inadequacy?
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Feelings—Your inner Guidance System

The problem with emotionally abandoning yourself in any of these ways is that you are bypassing your entire inner guidance system.

For example, do you know how you feel when you abandon yourself?

Most people feel anxious, depressed, empty, alone, guilty, shamed and/or angry when they abandon themselves, but they rarely connect these feelings with their self-abandonment. Instead, they believe they feel this way due to something external.

If you start to tune into how you feel when you judge yourself, or when you are in your head thinking rather than being present in your body, or you are acting out addictively or making others responsible for you, you will discover how awful you are making yourself feel. You will discover that your feelings of anxiety, depression, emptiness, aloneness, guilt, shame, abandonment or anger are letting you know that you are abandoning yourself.

Do you want to know this? If you do, make a decision to start learning from your feelings, rather than avoiding them. You will discover that when you learn to take emotional responsibility, it becomes far easier to take personal responsibility in all other areas of your life.

You will discover that when you start to learn from your feelings, rather than continue to avoid them, your entire life will change for the better.

Quick Tip Look Who’s Talking…
What if you embraced yourself?

What if, every time you felt anxious, depressed, empty, alone, guilty, shamed or angry, you decided to send love to yourself?

Imagine if a child came to you feeling any of those feelings – would you turn them away?

Would you tell them they were stupid or that they were making everything up?

Of course you wouldn’t – it is time for you to give the love and compassion you would give to someone else to yourself.

The next time you find yourself in any of the above negative emotional states, ask yourself this question – and when you do, pay attention to what comes to your mind AND to what you feel in your body…

“I’m feeling _______ – how can I send love to myself right now?”

Asking this question will instantly shift your awareness and your being-ness from judgment and abandonment to acceptance and love – and within that lies all the healing you need.

“Hi Kristen,

I just wanted to say I am so thrilled to see you creating programs!

I have followed you on the Manifest Everything Now webinars, and absolutely LOVE you! You have got to be the best interviewer I have ever listened to. You conduct the interviews with such class and poise, and you have this warmth that shines when you speak – it makes the listener very comfortable, and creates automatic trust.

When I saw the email about the Ultimate Manifesting Shortcut, watched the video and loved it, I immediately ordered your How To Attract Money Fast program. Then to my delight, I saw you had an Affiliate Program up and ready – so I IMMEDIATELY signed up for that, of course!

I want to let you know that this was the most well prepared, set-up, and easy to use process to sign up as an Affiliate that I’ve EVER seen. It was a snap to do – and with you having everything organized so that my affiliate link was instantly created and included in links and banners right on the page – talk about giving a person incentive to get promoting right away!

Terrific job Kristen, I just wanted to let you know that 🙂 I am so happy to share “YOU” with everyone I know, and also advertise on my website.

Love and hugs,


26 Responses to “Are You Abandoning Yourself?”

  1. SZANTO ANNA says:


  2. Mbuvi says:

    This is exciting and provoking me to think through myself right away…I am abandoning myself and will take action that I wont anymore

  3. william musyoki says:

    This is very great have never come across something like this i tell you .Thank you so much.

  4. Arnold says:

    Many, many thanks to you dear Kristen, i am now consentrating on the HOW TO ATTRACT MONEY FAST program i got yesterday as a gift from you. I know for certain this has been my biggest passion for many years now. I have been really out to know any secrets whatsoever that can help me put more cash into my account without violating the law or hurting anybodys feelings. Now, today again, i am getting more great news from you. You are a God sent !!! sincerely, Arnold.

  5. Arnold says:

    A very BIG Yes! i am really abondoning myself and, this has been going on for many years now. Its now unbearable!

  6. Mark says:

    This was something that I really needed today….I am having a rather rough patch in my life right now feeling abandoned and depressed….This was a nice pick me up today and I appreciate the timing of this email from you….after a break up with “I thought the love of m y life”, I know it will be a slow healing process ahead but this too will pass….I know that God has something better out there for me if I will only look for the opportunities….I find that writing this has helped me immenesly….Thanks for all the work you do…

    Mark Thomas

    • Kristen says:

      Hi Mark!

      I am honored that you trust me to be with you on your journey. You are healing and you will come out stronger than before!

      I believe in you!

  7. Jacqueline Harmon says:

    Kristen just read about abandoning yourself. You hit the nail on the head with me because I suffer from anxiety attacks and have always wondered why. Now I am beginning to understand some things about myself by reading this. I also wonder why I cannot attract posterity and wealth.

    • Kristen says:

      Hi Jacqueline! That’s great that your awareness is increasing – and here is something to add to that – prosperity and wealth are another form of energy – and may be another area where you abandon yourself energetically. Begin to focus on raising your vibration in every area (not just with wealth) and more positive manifestations will flow to you in every area of your life. I have a training video that will explain further at – make sure you take notes 🙂

  8. Virginia says:

    Such a good article. Thank you. I have two nieces who fit into this category so perfectly. Unfortunately, they would both deny most of the information as fitting them. That’s the sad case for many folks who face abandonment of themselves in one way or another. They are so wrapped up in their misery or denial that they can’t and won’t look for logical and loving solutions.

    • Kristen says:

      Hi Virginia!

      Yes, this is so often true that we can see things in others that they are not ready to see in themselves – quietly send them love and healing and you will assist their energetic vibration around this!

  9. Kristi says:

    Thank you for creating these programs. I enjoy hearing and reading from the experts you have brought to us. Many have given me a new perspective in my thinking and actions. Keep up the good work!

  10. Earl west says:

    Thank you all my life -i,ve felt on the sideline- watching life go by- i,m 68 years old–have always been scared to meet anyone from my real unhidden self. only now (i know-About time!!!) i just long to be more creative and at peace! thanks for this excellent article!

  11. Abimael says:

    Wow, this is so powerful, is like a massage to the soul. Thank you very much.

  12. Leia says:

    Thanks for the article. It hit home with the current situation I am dealing with now. This article and other emails & programs you have sent really help. Thank-you. Leia

  13. Zohra says:

    My goodness!!! This was really an eye opening for me and coming at the exact right timing!!! I am still amazed at how the universe can deliver its message to us! I am feeling loved right now!! 🙂
    Thank you so much for being the messenger!!!
    I will sure put in practice the quick tip every time I feel emotionally abandoned! I felt so good afterword! 🙂
    Thank you! Thank you! Thank you Kristen!

  14. Preeti chhabda says:

    Thx ?..this has been an eye opener I have been causing pain to my self abandoning my self shall use your tips yhx

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