What do you bring to the party?

Okay…I’ve recieved more than a handful of emails in just the last day asking me things like

“How do I get people to give me the break I need?”
“How do I get people to put my products in front of their list?”
“How do I get people to introduce me to someone that can really help me?”
“How do I get people to really appreciate me?”

and so on…

I get it…I used to wonder those same things…

BUT I had it all wrong…look at the questions I listed above…

What is the one part that repeats in every question?

“How do I get people to…”

I’ll tell you now…you need to stop looking for how you can get them all to make your life better and more successful and instead ask yourself this question –

“What do I bring to the party?”

And here’s the deal with this…

I didn’t say to ask yourself what you bring to the table…

THERE IS A HUGE DIFFERENCE…

What you bring to the table is all of your natural gifts and abilities…

What you bring to the party is who you are, what you give, how you act, the energy you give off…

Let me explain further…

I know a TON of people that bring a lot to the table…

I mean they are talented and bright and have potential that you wouldn’t believe…

BUT…

They don’t bring anything to the party…

In fact half the time they don’t even show up to the party, and when they do, they are so busy sitting there wondering why no one sees everything that they bring to the table, that they come off as angry, withdrawn, insecure or boring — they actually betray what they bring to the table by bringing nothing to the party…

So, ask yourself, what do I bring to the party?

Leave me a comment and let me know!

Go Big!

Kristen

P.S. You can still vote for Oprah to pick up my show (and you can vote as much as you want until midnight of July 3rd) – here’s the link, I appreciate all of the support!

http://myown.oprah.com/audition/index.html?request=video_details&response_id=9753&promo_id=1

Kristen - Free Report Reveals the 5 Keys to Attract Money, Success and Happiness even in a Failing Economy. Get the Report Now!

Tags: Act, Amp, Audition, Break, Emails, Half The Time, July 3rd, Kristen, Lot, More Than A Handful, Natural Gifts, Oprah, People, Response Id, Video Details, Vote

Attract Money Fast, Find Your Purpose, Inspired Action, Key to a Fulfilling Life, Law of Attraction, Make Money from Your Passion, Personal Development | Kristen | June 30, 2010 1:11 am

21 Comments

By Melody, June 30, 2010 @ 5:10 am

I bring my willingness to listen and to ask what ‘they’ want.

I ask them to explain to me their worries, concerns and problems and when I have received the answers to these questions in detail and I have made mental notes of them, I ask them for a contact phone number or email address – saying to them that I think I might have the address of someone who might be able to help but I don’t have the details on me but I’d be happy to give them the information in the next day or so,
Then I thank them for talking with me and give them my business card asking them to get in touch if they haven’t heard from me within the time I’ve specified as I sometimes have a terrible memory and it needs to be jogged!

And then I pass on the information I have promised.

Usually I have a little blurb about what my next offer is and ask them to pass it on to anyone who they think might be interested. 9/10 I get asked for some more information or I am booked for an appointment!

BUT there is something that needs to be said here 1) your offer of help must be genuine and followed through on. 2) if you can’t help straight away, say so and ask if you can keep their details as you meet lots of people and it may be the very next one you meet. Most people will still give you their contact details.

Notice I have not talked about what I can do. I have left that for another time. I have focused on trying to help them solve their problem, without giving advice or telling them how to do it – both of which do not grow relationships.

All of these actions come from a space of love – BUT they often bring great results including giving you clients you never expected. Word of mouth is a wonderful thing!!

Bless-sings
Melody
By Mike, June 30, 2010 @ 5:10 am

Dear Kristen, I understand the basic idea, but as a shy, introverted person with low esteem and fears of rejection and being laughed at, HOW do I bring myself to the party?
By Marko, June 30, 2010 @ 5:24 am

Kristen, this is so very true. Thank you for reminding me …
By Leonard Sappleton, June 30, 2010 @ 5:39 am

Wonderful stuff that Iam actually discovering now. What d I bring to the party? Self confidence, my big dream to be a success coach. Excellent people skills and a passion to WIN. Have a great day!!
By Ed, June 30, 2010 @ 5:54 am

What do I bring to the party? I bring me and my love for people, with all my knowledge and experiences to be a testamony and to encourage and help others.
By LaDonna Wheeler, June 30, 2010 @ 7:17 am

Kristen, your message totally resonates with me. It’s too bad not everyone is in vibrational harmony.
By Peter Chabanowich, June 30, 2010 @ 9:16 am

Hello Kristen: You asked us to send you information about our lives and dreams, so I am saying “Yes!” and here we go. Born in ’46, adopted at eight months old. Only child. Wonderful childhood – lived on a farm. Early on I displayed interest in music and drawing/painting. Unfortunately I was unsure, fearful and lazy. Though I worked as a pianist in my teens, it was not until I was 24 that I began studying in earnest under the mentorship of a concert pianist. Luckily, I eventually worked in some wonderful venues. It wasn’t until about six years ago that the work dried up – the entertainment scene has changed. The day jobs I’ve taken on don’t pay well, and the disappointment slowly became a low-key drone. I began studying painting in oils just over two years ago. Because of job demands, my energies have been depleated. I just lost work, so there is that anxiety as well. Recently I connected with an old friend (piano player extraordinaire) who boosted my spirits about music, and I feel I can devote myself to the art again. There it is, a severely edited autobiography. Though my “Yes!” is said, I am at the very beginning of the process of reestablishing my skills.
Kristen, I am confident that your Show with the Oprah network will happen, blossom and lead you to greatness. Bless you and please keep in touch as you have through emails. Thank you for being there for so many of us! Ciau, Peter
By Kristen, June 30, 2010 @ 10:22 am

Thanks Peter!

Keep saying “Yes”!

Go Big!
Kristen
By Kristen, June 30, 2010 @ 10:23 am

Hi Ed!

That’s GREAT!

Go Big!
Kristen
By walter daniels, June 30, 2010 @ 10:24 am

Depending on the need, I can bring a lot. OTOH, ay physical parties that can be another question. I’m allergic to alcohol and some other common condiments. Being in a wheelchair limits what I can bring. Usually, I buy cookies, breads, etc. Anybody can do that.
When it comes to various skills, I’ve done lots of things. I’ve also learned to make the complex easy to understand.
By Kristen, June 30, 2010 @ 10:27 am

Love it! Keep it up!

Go Big!
Kristen
By Kristen, June 30, 2010 @ 10:28 am

Hi Mike!

You don’t have to be extroverted to bring yourself to the party…you just need to be true to yourself…are you a positive person? If so, just focus on bringing that energy to everything you do and it will make a difference!

Go Big!
Kristen
By Kristen, June 30, 2010 @ 10:28 am

Awesome answer!

Go Big!
Kristen
By Taunya, June 30, 2010 @ 2:17 pm

I bring questions about “them” to the party. I try to learn as much about them as I can. What’s their favorite thing to do? What are they passionate about? Where do they love to eat? Who in their family do they spend the most time with? Do they have a favorite sport? You get the point? ~To the universe: I used to be an introvert, but I am not anymore. I am OVER being quiet and poor! ~Taunya
By Joe Johnson, June 30, 2010 @ 4:25 pm

Hello Kristen, How Could you know exactly what my problem was and after I fixed it I read your post and the joy I felt inside was that of (I am understanding what is going on with my changes)
Wah Hooo!!!!!!!

thanks,
Joe Johnson
By Andrea, June 30, 2010 @ 5:39 pm

That’s well put, a distinction between what do I bring to the table, and what can I bring to the party. I think this is also a good way of asking, how can I add value to others?
By sue, June 30, 2010 @ 8:14 pm

I totally agree, it is also about having the confidence in yourself, each time you do it you gain more confidence. Just bite the bullet and do it!!
By winnie, July 1, 2010 @ 12:44 am

Dear Kristen,
thanks a lot for your ideas, for me i have to say that I always bring a lot to others who ask for my help or even if I notice that someone is in dificulty I always propose my service if not I refer them to someone who could help them. But it’s the contrary which hapens to me, once they have used my amability they may turn from me or if ever they are in no more dificulty they forget me I don’t need to be re-emboursed but only their friendship or their moral support. It’s also happen that when I need some help ther is no body around me, this also happen in my own family. But I thank you for what your doing though I’m lonely ( i.e I’ve only my husband my children are learning far from home they are abroad, in France,it’s rarely that they are in contact with me and I’ve lost father and recently my mother, practically no friends when I’m saying lonely . I’ve colleagues at work and practically rarely that I meet other members of the family…they are not too busy but perhaps jealous of my sucess I don’t know because I’m not an egocentric person I’ll always share what I know to everyone. Thnks for having taken much of your time. Winnie.
By Shankar, July 1, 2010 @ 1:29 am

Hello Kristen,
I bring myself to the party. “myself” includes my Higher Self(which is said to be pure),love, affection, lots of smile, kindness and readiness to make friends. Most importantly, eagerness to listen and learn from others – because from what I have found, that’s the easiest way to learn and grow.
Light and Love,
Shankar, India
By Rosemary, July 1, 2010 @ 7:28 am

Melody has it about right. My field is real estate, and right now people are hurting because of the continuing market downturn. They need practical help and a path through all the conflicting information and come-ons that have left them in a worse position than the original problem that caused them to go into mortgage default in the first place. I offer that help, and pretty much do as Melody suggests: Get their contact information and answer their immediate need. This is especially true for those who are seeking residential rentals. I don’t do that, but I know someone who does, and does it well. She doesn’t reciprocate, but the value to those to whom I refer her is incalculable.

My office building offers fabulous small offices with lots of services. By helping people solve their space needs, I help them to be successful. But, sometimes, they are not ready to lease, so if I can help them in other ways, perhaps later they will need one of my spaces or programs, or they will think of me when someone they know has that need. What is important is that I put my energy, enthusiasm and knowledge out there. Bottling them up inside myself wastes them.

You know the old saying: What goes around, comes around. I choose to send positive vibrations out. Maybe that will help lighten the load for other people as well as myself, if only infinitesimally.

Rosemary
By jack, July 9, 2010 @ 4:21 am

Kristen, this is so very true. Thank you for reminding me …