What do you bring to the party?

Okay…I’ve recieved more than a handful of emails in just the last day asking me things like

• “How do I get people to give me the break I need?”
• “How do I get people to put my products in front of their list?”
• “How do I get people to introduce me to someone that can really help me?”
• “How do I get people to really appreciate me?”

and so on…

I get it…I used to wonder those same things…

BUT I had it all wrong…look at the questions I listed above…

What is the one part that repeats in every question?

“How do I get people to…”

I’ll tell you now…you need to stop looking for how you can get them all to make your life better and more successful and instead ask yourself this question –

“What do I bring to the party?”

And here’s the deal with this…

I didn’t say to ask yourself  what you bring to the table…

THERE IS A HUGE DIFFERENCE…

What you bring to the table is all of your natural gifts and abilities…

What you bring to the party is who you are, what you give, how you act, the energy you give off…

Let me explain further…

I know a TON of people that bring a lot to the table…

I mean they are talented and bright and have potential that you wouldn’t believe…

BUT…

They don’t bring anything to the party…

In fact half the time they don’t even show up to the party, and when they do, they are so busy sitting there wondering why no one sees everything that they bring to the table, that they come off as angry, withdrawn, insecure or boring — they actually betray what they bring to the table by bringing nothing to the party…

So, ask yourself, what do I bring to the party?

Leave me a comment and let me know!

Go Big!

Kristen

P.S. You can still vote for Oprah to pick up my show (and you can vote as much as you want until midnight of July 3rd) – here’s the link, I appreciate all of the support!

http://myown.oprah.com/audition/index.html?request=video_details&response_id=9753&promo_id=1

You can’t do that! WHAT?

A friend and I were just talking and, I don’t even know how we got on the subject, but we started talking about signing our names…

Weird topic –  but stick with me here and you’ll see why I’m all fired up…

My friend said, “When I was little, I was the girl that would sign my name and take up like half the page when I did it…”

Then she continued…

“Until one day when my grandmother saw me and she said, ‘You can’t do that!’”

You can’t do that…

How many times have you heard those exact words?

How many times did you hear them — or something a lot like them — before you were 10 years old?

I guarantee you can’t count how many times!

And here’s the deal…

When people say that to you, for the most part, there really truly are trying to protect you from something (at least in their own minds)…

But let’s get real…

YOU CAN’T DO THAT has to be the worst 4 letter phrase around!

Then my friend said the most amazing thing — and this is the thing I really want you to think about…

She said, “Sometimes I look back and think that I wish I was still that girl…”

Here’s the truth…

You CAN DO THAT (assuming you aren’t hurting anyone please) AND even if you used to do that and stopped when you were told that you couldn’t do that…

You are STILL that person…

THAT is still the essence of you — even if it’s a bit buried, that is still who you are!

How can you reclaim that essence?

What are some of the things you were told you couldn’t do?

RECLAIM THEM!

I can’t wait for your comments on this one!

Go Big!

Kristen

Who do you have to be?

You know I love the power of questions…

And today I want to introduce you to one of the most powerful questions there is…

I know SO MANY of you are frustrated and feel like you are banging your head against a wall wondering WHEN will you finally have the success you are looking for…

I get emails about it all the time — emails that say things like:

• “Kristen, I’m doing everything I can think of, but I still don’t have enough money…”
• “Kristen, I’m doing everything I can think of, but I still haven’t lost the last 20 pounds…”
• “Kristen, I’m doing everything I can think of, but I still haven’t met my soul mate…”
• “Kristen, I’m doing everything I can think of, but I still don’t have enough time…”
• “Kristen, I’m doing everything I can think of, but I still don’t have enough opportunities…”

and the list goes on…

I know you are nodding your head right now in agreement — I know you know what this feels like — I’ve been there too…

UNTIL

I shifted my focus — this is what I did…

I asked myself a different question than I had ever asked myself before –

Do you want to know what that question was?

Of course you do…here it is…

I asked myself this…

“Who do I need to be to have ___________ ?”

Here’s another great follow up question to that one…

“What do I need to believe to have ____________?”

And another powerful question…

“How do I need to act and look at life and handle setbacks to have ___________?”

Here’s the deal…

Whatever you want, I guarantee there is proof in this world that it is possible because I promise you someone else has it –

Study those people that have what you want –

• Who are they?
• What do they believe?
• What do they focus on?
• How do they handle setbacks?
• What do they expect?

This works for EVERYTHING –

Whether you want

• More money
• To lose weight
• To be a famous artist
• To have a successful business
• To find the love of your life
• To excel at your current job
• To discover your passion and purpose

etc. etc. etc.

STOP looking at what you don’t have and instead focus on who you have to be to have what you want…

I promise you that right now you are EXACTLY who you need to be to have what you currently have — and I know you are ready to change that!

Leave me a comment — let me know what your beliefs and more need to be for you to live the life you want…

I also have a video with more (free) power questions for you at:

http://www.gobigcoach.com/sos/powerquestions.html

Go check it out — this stuff can change your life — I know because it changed mine!

You are extraordinary!

Go Big!

What’s the payoff?

This post will push a few buttons, but it is unbelievably important…

I’m just going to jump right in…

If you are struggling with something consistently over a decent period of time (3 months or more…) then I want to ask you 1 question…

What’s the payoff?

I know you hate whatever it is you are struggling with and you want nothing more than for it to stop and be a thing of the past…

But I’ll ask you 1 more time…

What’s the payoff?

If I’ve hit a nerve here and you want to jump through the computer and tell me I’m crazy…stick with me while I explain…

Let me do this by giving an example…

A friend of mine had been in theatre for years…

He was very successful and went from one tour to the next…

He never stopped working…but the one thing that kept eluding him was a Broadway Show…

He was more than talented enough…

He worked harder than most people in the business…

But it just kept not happening and it was driving him crazy!

One night we were sitting and talking and he was telling me how frustrated he was, how he was having trouble watching people who weren’t as talented and who didn’t work as hard get Broadway Shows while he didn’t.

I looked him dead in the eye and said, “What’s the payoff?”

He said, “What do  you mean?”

I said — “What are you getting 0n a subconscious level by NOT getting your Broadway Show?”

For a second I thought he was going to leave the table…so I continued…

“I’m not being mean…but seriously, you’ve already told me you are more than qualified and you work all the time in big productions…so what are you getting from it?”

He sat and glared at me for more than a minute…

And then his face changed — his eyes flashed and he got a weird smile on his face and then he said, “Wow…I can’t believe I’m saying this, but you’re right. Every time I complain about all the people who aren’t as good as me who are getting rewarded with what I deserve, I feel a weird sense of being better than them…like I work so much harder than them and deserve it more than them…so in my subconscious, by not getting what I want I’m somehow giving myself the message that I’m better than everyone else…”

I said, “Wow, that was honest…”

He said, “Yeah, but as I’m verbalizing it, I’m realizing that I don’t care about being better than everyone else, I just want my Broadway Show!”

Here’s what happened after that…

He consciously stopped judging people who were getting what he wanted…

In fact, whenever he wanted to complain about them, instead he said 3 words…

“That’s for me!”

It didn’t happen overnight…

It took a year of him sticking to his guns…

But he finally got his Broadway Show (and has been on Broadway ever since)…

So…

I’m going to ask you 1 more time…

Whatever it is you are struggling with…

“What’s the payoff?”

Be honest with yourself…

Leave me a comment and let me know!

Go Big!

Kristen

Who are you listening to?

When it comes to your life and your goals and desires…

Let me ask you 1 question…

Who are you listening to?

This is one of the biggest challenges today…

• There are a whole bunch of people in your life who are more than ready and willing to give you advice on what you can and especially what you CAN’T or SHOULDN’T do…
• There are countless people standing by, ready to protect you or steer you toward what is smart and sensible and realistic…

So often these people listen to your ideas and tell you they won’t work, or they aren’t smart…

And when they do, it’s easy to get discouraged and abandon your ideas…

It’s easy to get deflated and look for a more sensible or realistic approach that doesn’t get you excited, but at least ypu’ve heard it makes sense…

Here’s my big question for you…

When it comes to the people who you are listening to…

Do they have what you want?

I’m all for advice and mentors and perspective…

BUT

Please, please, please…

Get that advice from people who are where you want to go…

• If you want advice on how to start making $10, 000 a month through passive income, should you listen to someone who has only ever made $3500/month and traded time for every single dollar of it?
• If you want your relationship to be healthy, communicative and passionate, are you going to listen to your friend who is in a loveless marriage?
• If you want to get into the best shape of your life, are you going to go to someone who has never exercised a day in their life for advice on how to do it?

When I ask my coaching clients these questions they always see how ridiculous it is to get advice from someone who doesn’t have what you want…

AND YET…

Most have them have been doing just that…

Most people have a group of advisers that they love and who love them, but when it comes to deciding if your ideas and dreams can happen…

When it comes to discovering the path to design the life you desire…

Make sure you are listening to people who know from experience what it takes to get there!

Listen…

Your friends and family are so important to love you and add to your life…

And if you your friends and family do have the things that you desire, then PLEASE listen to them!

But often your advisers serve a different purpose…

Start finding people who have what you want (at least the next level from where you are)…

Your life will start to change instantly when you do!

As always, leave a comment here…I love hearing from you and what you have to say might be helpful to someone else!

Go Big!

Kristen

P.S. My Go Big Now! VIP Program is designed to give you the strategies of successful people so that you can immediately start moving toward the life of your dreams.  I’m accepting new members and would love to see you there… www.gobigcoach.com